This Sacred Eyeball allows the wearer to see only the Goodness of peoples’ souls (and turns a blind eye to all of their sins and earthly transgressions), as does Sister Maddie herself.
-“You are all beautiful to me” proclaims Sister Maddie Bout You.
As the legend is told, Sister Missionary Position’s Intimate Hairs spontaneously curled during her first Ecclesiastical Nocturnal Orgasm. Rumor has it that when Prince heard this, he was inspired to write “When Doves Cry”
“Your hair is like a flock of goats descending from Mount Gilead” Songs of Soloman.
-“I’m not a dove, but believe me I cried!” Prince.
As a young child sneaking sweets in Church, Sister Hera Sees Candy had an Epiphany when she realized that she always feels closer to God with something hard in her mouth.
-“Now I see what all of the fuss is about! “ espoused Sister Hera in her moment of ecstatic vision.
When the young aspiring ballerina finished reading “Are You There God, It’s Me Margaret?”, she was overcome with a feminine vision that manifested a Sacred Levitating Female Reproductive System, from which she enshrined the Fallopian Tube as a symbol of Sacred Feminitity, and cheesy teen novels.
-“Go Forth and read some more! Praise be the Fallopian Tube!” she cried in rapt joy.
As a young Novice, Sister Mary Media had an oral miracle, in which the ancient voice of Saint Appalonia (the patron saint of dentistry) began broadcasting her prophesies through a silver filling in her mouth. This Blessed Tooth was pulled and enshrined to spread the good word near and far.
-“I can’t believe the ruckus that blasted out of my little old mouth!” she swore.
During a routine hip replacement, this Holy Shard broke off, shining gold and hovering over the operating table as Angels Trumpted in Glory.
-“Craziest hip replacement I ever did! These Sisters are surely Miraculous!” crowed the startled surgeon.
Sister Mary Timothy Simplicity was such a sensitive empath, even as a child, that she never cried tears, only quartz crystals, that are said to heal all that behold them.
Psalms 126:5 “They that sow tears shall reap in joy”.
-“I just knew that child was blessed!” swore her mother.
In 1987, as Pope John Paul II faced the press, Sister Vicious Power Hungry Bitch posted her demands on the door of Saint Mary’s Cathedral with Lee Press On Nails. This bloody relic was pulled from the site.
“That hurt!” cried Sister Vish!